Children are bound to feel anxious and fearful when they enter the unfamiliar atmosphere of a hospital, and they depend on their parents to reassure them and help them keep their spirits up as they go through treatment. This isn’t easy for parents, because they have their own fears and stresses to cope with when their child is ill. But staying busy is a good way to relieve anxiety. And there’s much parents can do to make a hospital stay easier for their child and themselves.

Supporting Your Child

As a parent, you are the ultimate overseer of your child’s health care. The staff at CHOC recognizes that you play a vital role in the healing process and welcomes your involvement. Following are some ways in which you can help: 

• Do whatever you can to help your child feel at home.  
• Bring your child’s own pillow, blanket and pajamas to the hospital. And don’t forget best-loved books and toys. 
• Personalize the room with cheerful posters and cards, family photos, and your child’s artwork. Bulletin boards are available in every room just for this purpose. 
• Ask for favorite foods at mealtime. 
• Be there as much as possible for your child and have a friend or family member visit while you take a break. 
• Spend the night in your child’s hospital room. One adult may stay per night and showers are available. 

Reassuring your Child

Make the most of your opportunities to comfort your child during his or her hospital stay. Remember, there is healing power in touch, so maintain as much physical closeness as possible. Also:

• Be aware of expressions on your face that might be upsetting. Worry and fear are easily detected by little ones. 
• Talk to your child about what to expect in the hospital. He or she doesn’t need to know everything, but the fear of the unknown is often worse than the truth.  
• Sign your child up for the hospital’s pre-admission program, which familiarizes patients and their families with the hospital environment, procedures and equipment. The program, presented weekly by the Child Life and Nursing Departments, includes a puppet show that helps relieve children’s fears by telling the story of CHOCO Bear’s hospital experience. After the puppet show a nurse answers parents’ questions while children are given a chance to play with stethoscopes, thermometers and other medical equipment. For reservations and information, call Recreation Therapy at (714) 532-8473. 
• Plan appropriate activities. The playroom and hospital school have a lot to offer. The teacher will even visit school-age children in their rooms and give them homework or projects. 
• On some units siblings may be able to visit. They may also be able to join in recreation therapy activities, but ask the recreation therapist before bringing them in.

Communicating with the Hospital Staff

Don’t hesitate to ask questions of doctors, nurses and other members of the hospital staff. If you are well-informed, you’ll feel less anxious and so will your child. Here are some things to be aware of as you think about what you need to discuss with the hospital staff:

• It helps to know what to expect. Ask about the course of treatment and the doctor’s goals for the coming days/weeks. You may want to arrange to meet with your child’s doctor privately in one of the patient-family education rooms. 
• Pay attention to the medications your child is given: Have they changed? Has the dosage changed? 
• When you call the hospital for information, find out the name of the person with whom you are speaking. Ask for the same person the next time you call. 
• If your child will need care or equipment after leaving the hospital, contact a case manager at (714) 532-8582.

What You Can Do For Yourself

It’s all too easy for parents who have a child in the hospital to neglect their own health and well-being. But you can do more for your child if you take good care of yourself. So be sure to:

• Share your thoughts and feelings with others, including parents who are going through the same experience. If you’re interested in obtaining information about a support group or getting in touch with other parents of CHOC patients, call (714) 532-8521. 
• Take steps to relieve stress. When you feel tense, do some stretching and breathing exercises. It also helps to keep a journal and write down things you need to remember about your child’s treatment medications, allergies, tests, doctor visits, etc. Journal writing is also a good outlet for feelings you have difficulty expressing. 
• Pamper yourself. Get a facial, manicure, massage or haircut. 
• Protect your health. Eat regularly-you can have a meal sent to your child’s room for a small fee and take vitamins. When your child sleeps, ask for a pillow and blanket and take a nap yourself. 
• Take breaks. Go for a walk. Read a book. Do whatever gives you a physical lift and emotional relief. Remember, if you’re rested and in good spirits, your child will be more at ease. Accept help from others. Don’t hesitate to let neighbors or friends make meals for your family, do housework, baby-sit your other children, or run errands for you. 
• Simplify your life as much as possible. For your convenience, there is an ATM machine across the hall from the gift shop in the lobby. You’ll find a number of practical items you may need at the gift shop, which is open from 9 a.m. to 8 p.m. The cafeteria is open from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. 
• You’ll also gain piece of mind knowing that you are doing everything you can for your child. Read books and speak to others who have dealt with your child’s illness so that you’ll be a well-informed participant in the decision-making process. Another very satisfying way to participate in your child’s care and to help other children is by donating blood and encouraging others to become donors. The Blood and Donor Services program relies on volunteer blood donors you and your friends, neighbors, and co-workers to provide this gift of life. For information about how you can help, call (714) 532-8339.

Easing Financial Concerns

Dealing with the financial issues and paperwork that come with hospitalization is often a major source of stress for parents. It needn’t be. These steps will make the process easier for you:

• Organize paperwork into files marked Paid Bills, Unpaid Bills, Bills in Process, etc. 
• Speak directly to your insurance company to ask about necessary pre-approvals, deductibles, co-payments, pre-existing conditions, etc. 
• If you are feeling overwhelmed, ask someone you trust to organize and complete the paperwork for you.

Call or go to the hospital’s financial consulting department for information about insurance benefits, payment plans, California Children’s Services, CalOptima and Medi-Cal eligibility. Hours are Monday through Friday, 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. From your room, call extension 8444; from home, call (714) 532-8444.

When Your Child is in the Hospital

Don’t forget to take care of yourself. You’ll be able to do more for your child if you are in good health, so be sure to:

• Eat regularly - you can have a meal sent to your child’s room for a small fee. 
• Take breaks. Do something you enjoy - walking, reading or listening to music. 
• Breathe slowly and deeply when you are feeling stress. Stretching exercises will also help you relax. 
• Pamper yourself. Get a facial, manicure, massage, or haircut. 
• Protect your health and take vitamins. When your child sleeps, ask for a pillow and blanket and take a nap yourself. 
• Let others help by making meals for your family, doing housework, babysitting your other children, or running errands for you. 
• Share your thoughts and feelings with others. Call (714) 532-8521 for more information on support groups for parents of CHOC patients.